I didn't do that 'end of travels' blog did I, with 5 days to go in New Zealand? Although if you are reading Mike's Travel over Tribulations blogs you would be forgiven for thinking we are still there, as he is about a week behind the times although almost finished. Yes we had a 3 hour flight from Auckland to Brisbane and then a 14 hour flight from Brisbane to Dubai ending with an upgraded 4 hour Business class flight (that Devitt luck again and OMG was it good) from Dubai to Larnaca, but I was not inspired to write. Watched 4 great films though!
We have been back in Paralimni, Cyprus now for 6 days and re-negotiating being in one location for more than a day. Mike is setting the pace with his writing and I am following behind with the beginnings of an attempt to teach myself some basic Russian, improving my Excel knowledge, Kindle reading (happy times, it went out of the window when in the Southern Hemisphere) and as ever, generally organising our lives as I am prone to do. Oh yes, and Sam's life but with less success... Nothing new there then!
Mike is re-developing his website, has purchased a domain name and host and taking the blogs forward in a new dimension and this has led to him requesting my help as he also needs to continue with his novel... Busy boy. Reluctantly (technology does my head in much of the time) I have agreed to learn and become pro-active with his website... Help! First step is to think about how we introduce the website and ourselves which has made me delve into the hidden depths of my brain to think about the Why, the What if and the Wow of this all. So what follows are some reflective thoughts that I have put together and which I hope to copy and paste (see how good I am on computers tee hee) into Mike's website.
Did we embark on this '9 months out' because we simply wanted to try living life to a different tune and follow a new path? Yup I think it was! It's like a mini retirement. But something has changed since we left our lovely UK, we have seen and experienced so much and we want more please sir. So alongside Russian and Mr Excel, I intend to research ways of taking many mini retirements interspersed with earning cash, that would be doing some paid work then... Bugger!
My Mum told me over a very long facetime conversation the other day (thanks as always Mum for your exceptional PA skills) that she thinks we are going to become beach bums! Hmmm, I have pondered this observation of my mothers and nope, I really don't think so, because we both need worth and purpose in our lives, we are just in the process of discovering new ways of achieving this, which is awesome. In the UK, the jobs, mortgage, car and routine of life provided this and we have spent the last 25 years in the security of that environment. It is secure for sure, but it is also the boulder that holds you steadfast to a way of life that had begun to make us less than happy. So we used that very security, the house and some of it's equity to enable us to do this. We all have our thoughts on equity, comfort in retirement, leaving money behind for the kids (sorry Sam, don't think there will be a lot left) and what we should be aiming for but I will leave that with you to know.
Do you know what are the 2 things that always crop up in our regular life conversations... Sam and Taz and the ongoing emotional and financial responsibility to them both. It is a constant balancing task from afar which nags at my heart daily. Will our choices be life enriching for Sam as well, or damaging, a dagger to throw at us in later life when things don't go to plan? History of course could give me a clue if I choose to pay attention to that or I could trust in an ever changing young man who will make his own choices as he matures and grows wiser (fingers crossed).
Renting your house out, temporarily moving abroad and travelling is actually not as dramatic as it first feels you know. The jacking in of jobs, the gathering of your possessions into one garage and the goodbye party were all tough in their own way but it turns out, that you find a routine wherever you are, even in a Jucy campervan. Emails and FaceTime become paramount, but settling into a new culture if only for a few days is comforting and totally rewarding and a sense of belonging ensues which we unwittingly hang onto.
I have more time to work on the body beautiful (oh yes the naked sunbathing on our rooftop is now a daily 'for one hour only' occurrence), think about what we eat and how we shop. I am thinking our eating habits may not change all that much because we love the comfort food right, but I may just shove in something new or trial a new style of cooking... next on the agenda is making home-made lemonade with these wonderful fresh lemons free from Uncle Chris.
If you know Mike and I well, you will know that we were often guilty of not paying enough attention to our family and not taking the time to understand their importance in our lives. Nothing like a bit of absence to sort that one out and that's a jolly good thing. They give us grounding and a periodical reminder of how lucky we are... There's those lucky Devitt's again? But, I hope we manage to inspire a little as we have been inspired a lot.
Heck yes this is it! Pause, look hard and if you are crazy like me, say out loud to yourself hmmm this is beautiful and I am doing my very best to live in this moment, I promise. The dreaded finances rears its ugly head, doomsday with the inevitable spreadsheet as we top up the cost of our Dubai, Aus and NZ travels and discover what's left to live on until September. I am not going to lie to you, towards the end of NZ we seriously (with truly heavy hearts) considered the possibility that we would have to call it quits sooner than intended and head back to the UK. The bloody mad thing is that it is so much more expensive for us to live in the UK than here but we can work to cover the bills in the UK. Sound familiar? Money controls our lives, we cannot escape it and won't pretend otherwise, but this minimalist/budget lifestyle we are leading sure as hell reduces the cost dramatically. By the way, we had a massive Hi Five when the finances spreadsheet said that we can stay until September.
Saying goodbye to so many of the direct debits when we left the UK, cancelled one by one was good for the soul if not a little scary. Can we live anywhere? Now I think that I would almost always say yes because we have learned how to do it in a few different ways. To let go of stuff, the material things, is like losing a bit of weight at weight watchers.... Awesome when you jump on the scales. BTW, keep going Vicky, super slimsea girl woo hoo. Then we go clothes shopping on our last day in NZ because the camping hasn't been kind to the clothes, and I love it... Conflict aaaagggghhhh help!
So does it take a massive catalyst in your life to make this kind of change if only temporary? I honestly cannot answer that, but what I do know is that this has and continues to be our silver lining of our last ten years. It doesn't have to be that dramatic though, you can just wake up, do your research and pull together the combined strength of your relationship with your partner and go for it... simples!
It's mega cool to live as many parts of our lives as possible by some of our own chosen rules even though others still govern us. Phew, we had Sam quite young and we have been able to fly the nest as well, not just him. We didn't have the gumption at 18 to even think about travelling let alone act upon it. But we are not over the hill yet, oh no, it turns out we are a long way from it so why not now? Question the conventional for a while, have the riotous conversation with your other half and take more than one slice of the pie. We are not living the dream, we have just changed one up for another because we had a good life, it just wasn't fulfilling our desires. I am not writing this blog to convince others to travel (if convincing is needed then it is not for you) as it is not the elixir for everyone, maybe it's the cottage in the country and making life a lot quieter and calmer? But to share our experiences, our travels and the tribulations and how we continue to overcome some and give in to others may get you pondering. Of course we have questioned this oodles of times, but we have each other to talk it around and around and around and come up with a plan or a resolution. Sometimes we conclude nothing at the end of a two hour conversation and other times the route lays clearly before us. We are spreading that 'looked forward to' retirement over a longer period, starting earlier, with work in between. We are testing and dipping our toes in all the time.
Am I going to get bored or stale? People love to ask us what we are going to do with our time with a cynical look on their faces and waiting to pounce if our answer is not solid enough. So teaching English to Russian children and writing a novel and travel blogging pulls them up for a little while because that seems like work, phew we fit in again!! Is it going to be a once in a lifetime gap year or the first of many adventures, bloody aiming for the latter. Out of our comfort zone... Absolutely! Shoot, it takes me an hour to do an half hour shop in a new destination when it would have been a 20 minute whip round at Waitrose because I know it so well... Oops there it is, ease, comfort, lazy? I may be about to teach but I am the student at the moment attempting to move forward everyday with something new even if it is just hello in Russian. I just cannot let onto the little ones that I am probably more unsure than them wink wink.
I still belong to the MGGS Book Club (hi fellow readers) and I have begun the chosen book for this term, The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins. I mention this because at only 28 percent in the theme of comparison has cropped up regularly. This topic came up quite a bit with Mike and I as we covered thousands of kilometres in the Jucy Cabana. Comparison is really quite toxic you know and reading the novel you can see the damage of comparison with others, your life always falls short and that is far too negative for me, it's a must avoid pastime. It's interesting how I found out that our friends think we don't want to read about their home life because it is boring in comparison to what we are doing, Crapola Karen, Nicky, Juls, Kimmie, Vicky and other lovely girlies, it's not true, we love it! When travelling we are not misplaced, not transient, because we still control what we want to do, where we sleep, what we buy, eat, see and do, but you just realise you need to hear about home and friends, it makes you smile from ear to ear.
Cast out for other things in life. No, you can't just follow your heart, that's dodgy me thinks, there must be good ol' Michelle forethought, organisation, a plan, a theme and a route. But that schedule needs to be able to be flipped over and around as well, anywhere - in the beginning, middle or end without worrying. It's not an ego trip, a find myself trip, no that's blithe and a sense of feeling the need to put choices into a box, it's just "why the bloody hell not?" and I cannot come up with one really good enough answer not to.
